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When to send save-the-dates and invitations

Send too early and people forget. Send too late and half your guest list has already booked something else. The window is narrower than most couples expect, and the RSVP date matters more than the invitation date.

Here is the schedule that works, and what to do about the third of your list who will not reply on time.

Updated 5 min readStellanza wedding planning team

In this guide
  1. The schedule
  2. Set the RSVP date earlier than you need it
  3. Chasing, without it being awkward

The schedule

Work backwards from the date your caterer needs final numbers, which is usually two to three weeks before the wedding. Everything else follows from that.

When to send what
WhatWhenWhy then
Save-the-date8–12 months beforeBefore people book holidays. Only needed for destination weddings or peak-season dates.
Invitations8–12 weeks beforeClose enough that plans are firm, far enough for travel to be arranged.
RSVP deadline3–4 weeks beforeLeaves room to chase before the caterer's cut-off.
Final numbers to venue2–3 weeks beforeThe date the guaranteed minimum is locked.
Add two to four weeks at each stage for a destination wedding or a date in peak season.

Set the RSVP date earlier than you need it

The single most useful trick in this entire process: set your RSVP deadline two weeks before the date you actually need the numbers. That buffer is not padding β€” it is the chasing window, and you will use all of it.

Expect around a third of your guests to miss the deadline regardless of how clearly it is printed. That is normal and not a reflection on anyone. Plan for it instead of being annoyed by it.

Caterer's cut-off minus two weeks equals your printed RSVP date. Everything after that is chasing time you already budgeted for.

Chasing, without it being awkward

Chase by household rather than by person, and by whatever channel that household actually uses β€” a message to one cousin will do more than three formal emails. Keep a follow-up date against each non-reply so nobody gets chased twice or forgotten entirely.

When someone still has not answered a week after the deadline, ask directly and give them an easy out. "We need to confirm numbers on Friday β€” are you able to make it?" gets an answer. A gentle reminder does not.

Frequently asked questions

How far in advance should invitations be sent?
Eight to twelve weeks before the wedding. Add a few weeks if guests need to travel or if the date falls in peak season.
Do we need save-the-dates?
Only if guests need to book travel or time off, or if your date is in high season. For a local wedding with local guests, the invitation itself is enough.
What RSVP date should we set?
Three to four weeks before the wedding β€” about two weeks earlier than your caterer's cut-off. That gap is the time you will need to chase non-repliers.

Free tools for this

RSVP tracker
Track replies, seats and follow-up dates, with overdue chases flagged automatically.
Open tool
Wedding guest list template
Households, addresses and invitation status in one place.
Open tool

Sources

Every figure above comes from one of these. Wedding prices move quickly β€” check the date beside a source before you rely on it.

  1. 1.Wedding day timeline β€” complete guideBliss & Bone

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